paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
