just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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