I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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