Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
