My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
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