guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize