No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
