I must be too annoying 4 u.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Randomize
