i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
