so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
