Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
