I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
this just has baby written all over it
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
