Whoa Z and x make the same sound
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
Randomize
