He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Randomize
