I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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