If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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