It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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