i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
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