ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
