did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
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