Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
