Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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