when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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