are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize