Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Randomize
