brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
