Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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