Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
On Saturday, I sharted on my roommates dog while trying to make it smell my farts. Today I got security clearance to work for one of the most respected and secretive govt agencies in the US
It's the American dream
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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