garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
