I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
i wish my penis had a tongue
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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