I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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