you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
