Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I have feelings that need drinking.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Randomize
