i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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