what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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