I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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