STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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