Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
