Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Randomize
