I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
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