hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
All I want is dick and wine.
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