first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
