Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Randomize