I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
