I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
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