Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Randomize
