..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize
