On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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