so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Randomize
