fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
