How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Randomize
