I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
